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That's the sound of me opening this long sealed tomb. A tomb in which lies the embalmed emotions of an angsty, bi-polar, anti-social boy I once was. Reading through this stuff is really quite embarrassing to me. I can't believe the stuff I put out there in the world. I was a train wreck.


Inspired by STFU, Marrieds

The crimson pool beneath her grew as the hot blood of the fresh kills trickled down her jagged maw. Kate lifted her head to sniff the air, eyes gleaming menacingly as she took in an exotic scent which conflicted with those steaming from the four mangled bodies at her feet.
This smell wasn't Ashley. It wasn't Jessica, Andrea or Heidi…
As her miniature reptilian brain registered the new smell her eyes widened.
"isssss it… I ssssssmellYesssssss… it issssssss… my precsssssssiousssssssssss…" she hissed through her blood-stained teeth.
Uttering a feral howl, Kate bolted towards the alluring new scent. "diamondssssssssssss…"



Any time in the future that I have the slightest bit of interest in a man, just shoot me.

Now, restoring my phone because Words With Friends and a few other apps are glitching up on me big-time.
Listening to Enya, trying to regain any shred of sanity I can find.

Smoking Hot Curse...

Inspired by STFUmarrieds

Claire held the lighter before her eyes as if to burn the smug grin onto her face as she waved her left hand back and forth slowly. The cheap stone on her finger made weak attempts to reflect the dim flicker of light, but its dull facets were unable to grab any amount of visible spectrum.

"This diamond might be imitation, but our love isn't." said Clair aloud as she picked up her camera and hurried to the bathroom.
After draining the battery and filling the 8GB SD card to capacity, she ventured out to the garage, bringing the lighter with her. She picked up carton of lighter fluid as she closed to door behind her. A muffled moan emerged from behind stacks of old boxes.
"Darling! You are so wonderful! Now, all we have to do is have the wedding, then we'll live happily ever after."

As she checked the knots holding him to the chair, John swore through the oily rag she had used to gag him.
"Honey, you haven't been trying to escape again… Have you? That won't do at all. I'm in such a good mood and I've used up my last fire extinguisher, so I can't teach you another lesson tonight."

The lights went out as he listened to her feet shuffle through the garage. He still felt the burning in his mangled legs as the sound of chains and padlocks echoed around him.
"It's such a curse…"


1. Reply to this meme by yelling "Banana pudding!", and I will give you five words that remind me of you.
2. Then post them in your journal and explain what they mean to you.
3. Keep in mind that if I don't know you that well, your words might end up kind of odd or weird.

My words, courtesy ofabcdefghijkimmi

1. Cats
I love cats. I'm a cat person. I have a cat and I love him to death. Cats are cute and I will always prefer them over dogs. They're really fun to photograph too.

2. Sleeping
I love to sleep. Wish I could do it more, but my body and my brain seem to have something against staying in bed for hours on end.

3. Alaska
My Home Sweet Home. The only place I ever lived that I could ever call "home".

4. Macs
Apple makes some kick-ass products. Geekyness, artistic power and minimalism combined = lots of love from moi.

5. Coffee
Live on the stuff. Can't ever get enough of the stuff. I'd easily go broke buying expresso drinks and teas if I didn't have the restraint over my wallet that I manage to keep.

Anna, Viral Denial...

Inspired by STFUbelievers

Anna was soaring as the paramedics lifted the remains of the truck from her lifeless body. She looked down in horror as her already mutilated corpse was being further defiled by the EMTs as they fought to force the life back into her heart and lungs. As they moved her body away, she was surrounded by a brilliantly blinding light. Like a common moth, she lifted higher towards the source of the beautiful flickering. She couldn't tell whether it was curiosity or instinct that forced her higher, but she felt she had no control over what was happening to her now.

As the world she knew faded from view, she found herself in a new place. Everything was immaculate, shining and completely sterile. She felt as though she were strolling through a whitewashed museum where only pure, blank canvasses were on display. After much floating, she came upon a bed of huge clams.
"This is so bizarre" she thought.
As she looked closely Anna could see the clams were slowly opening and closing their maws. Several of them contained pearls the size of her head, tucked between folds of pink-white flesh. Beyond them was an enormous gate, seemingly made of the same huge pearls.
"Watch where you're hovering!" A voice called to her, seeming to come from nowhere and everywhere all at once. "Those clams leave quite a mess."

Then she saw him. A man, garbed in white flowing tresses holding a large golden book in his arms. He stood, or floated rather, just beyond the gate.
Try as she might, Anna felt herself unable to speak, partially due to the fact she no longer had a throat or lungs to create a voice.
"Don't hurt yourself trying to speak here!" The man said. "You can't. It works better if you just think really loud."
"…ok…" She thought successfully towards the man.
"The look on your face made me lol! I'm Peter, BTW."
"Whoa…" Anna thought aloud, shocked that internet acronyms had found their way into the afterlife.

"Well, let's get down to business, shall we?"
"…uh… Sure… I guess"
"What is your name, child?"
"…It's… Anna…"
The man took a few moments to scan pages of the book he held.
"Anna… Anna… Hmm… I'm not seeing your name here… Let me call B.B. down to see if he can clarify this situation."
"Oh, Big Bastard! XD! That's our nickname for Mr. H. Christ himself. We all got kinda drunk on communion wine at a Worship a while ago. And, well… Lets just say it's a long, hilarious story. One that would make anyone ROFLcopter right off a cloud!"
Anna was totally beginning to get weirded out when another figure appeared next to Peter. They seemed to be having a conversation in silence, then the new figure quickly receded from view.

"Uh oh… You're one of those, eh?"
"Huh? Wha…what do you mean?"
"Well, B.B. is refusing to see you. Mentioned something about not forwarding a viral message. In other words, you're being denied. Right here. In front of these gates. I guess that only leaves one option for you. Sorry, dearie… Truly I am, but there's nothing more I can do. >_< "

The clouds beneath Anna's form seemed to quiver and spiral. Lightning flickered as the clouds began to form a dark vortex. She felt herself pulled towards the darkness...


Angela's Shattered Heart...

Inspired by STFUmarrieds

Kevin reached into the cryogenic chamber with his gloved hands. The vitriolic fumes burned his face as he leaned in further. Gripping the dark red shape proved more difficult than he'd imagined as he could barely feel anything beyond the inner lining of the thick protective gloves. When he was certain he had a secure grasp on it, he withdrew his arms from the freezing chamber. As the warmth from the room hit the frozen mass the surface became oily. His grip proved too tight and the organ launched from his hands like a bar of soap in a hot shower. He watched as it arced towards the ceiling in slow motion. As he threw his weight towards the falling object his boot slipped in some of the greasy runoff. With a thud, his chest collided with the floor. Mere inches from his face the frozen heart met the cold slate flooring. Clenching his eyes tightly shut, he listened to the sound of the gelid biological structure separate into thousands of tiny pieces.

Pulling himself up amid the gory mess, he thought "Welp, guess we'll just have to try again next month… Sorry, Angela…"


Tara - Thoughtcrime

Inspired by STFUmarrieds:


Tara looked down at her glass of Beaujolais Nouveau morosely, wishing she had a fuller wine to help drown her sorrow. She sat alone, on her dingy love-seat in front of the telescreen. Even as the beautiful vistas scanned soothingly across the screen in their dedicated attempt to relax viewers, she couldn't bring her mind away from Tom and how he'd hurt her. She was hoping some of her comrades would take her out to help keep her mind from the pain, but surprisingly, none of them seemed to be available to entertain her. She'd already pinged Sharon four times in the last half-hour, but received no replies.
"I'll ping her again." thought Tara aloud as she reached for a strip of Stenograpaper.
The small strip transcribed her words into text as she spoke, "PING Sharon: Where are you? I need you to take me out of my head for a few hours tonight! Please reply! -Tara"
She then slipped the note into the pneumatic tube that was suspended from the ceiling by her seat. Peeling a new strip Stenograpaper, she had it interpret again. "STAT-UP FB: /me thinks Tom is a dirty cheating bastard." As it vanished into the tube she reached for her wine glass instead of following the urge to send successive status updates. As she emptied the glass, she felt darkness gathering around her.

Twelve hours later Tara awoke from her alcohol induced coma with a headache.
"Ugh…" She grunted as she pressed her palm to her forehead. She wished the FDA would hurry up and approve Soma for use in the States. It had been months since her last trip to Canada and she'd already depleted her only supply. Hence, her mini coma thanks to the cheap wine she kept handy.
Her palm still pressed to her head, she used her free hand to snatch a slip of Stenograpaper. She had it scrawl another status update to Facebook so her comrades would all know she wanted distraction.
It had been fifteen minutes of no responses from anyone, so she decided to clean up and go have some recreational rebound sex.

Grabbing her Malthusian belt, Tara hurried out the door.
As she waited in queue in the local Orgy-Club, she removed a strip of Stenograpaper from her pocket and had it convert a brief message. She poked it into one of the pneumatic holes by the entrance of the club.

After man number four, she realized that she was now even more obsessively thinking about Tom. Feeling angrier than before she gathered up her clothes and belt and made her way home. As soon as she was inside, she sent another status update through the tube. She turned to realize her telescreen had a Ping waiting. It was from Sharon. "Its about bloody time!" exclaimed Tara angrily. "She should've responded hours ago!"

It was a message of warning. Even though Sharon was vague, Tara knew that the cryptic message was telling her the Status Police were on to her. It was then that she finally realized she'd exceeded her update limits of consecutive rants and she knew it was only a matter of time before the Status Police were at her door.
"Damnit, Tom! This is all your fault, you fucking moron!" she screamed as a pounding sounded from her apartment door.


Happy Birthday, Mario

Inspired by STFUmarieds

"Are ya ready to go?" Brian asked.
"Huh? Where to?" Mario responded.
"I'll tell you when we get there, Birthday Boy! It's supposed to be a surprise!"
"Fine, fine… Just let me finish my coffee first though."

Fifteen minutes later they were climbing out of a cab and standing in front of a dilapidated old warehouse.
"Follow me." Brian said as he jogged around the side of the condemned building.
"Are we even allowed to be here?" said Mario, trying to keep up.
"Believe me, nobody else probably knows about this. There's nothing to worry about. Well… Um. Nevermind."
"What does that mean? What do you mean? Why are we here?"
"Just shut up and give me a hand here!" Brian grunted as he pressed his weight against an old rusted door, trying to coax it open.

Mario and Brian half stumbled through the door as it finally gave. Inside there was nothing, save for quite a bit of dirt and a few boxes strewn about. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, Mario was able to make out a large dark shape near the center of the warehouse floor.
Click! Brian had pressed a switch somewhere and the shape became illuminated.
As they walked closer, Mario could see it was a huge metal sphere with cables running from it in all directions.
"Ah. Here we are!" Brian said excitedly as he pressed a button on sphere.
A vertical seam appeared along the side of the sphere. The seam widened as the sphere opened and the sides spread further apart.
"Now this" exclaimed Brian excitedly "this is a wonderful machine… a simulator of sorts."
"Like a flight simulator?" Mario asked.
"No. A LIFE simulator! More specifically, a marriage simulator. With this, you'll experience, first hand, exactly what life is like after marriage!"
"Dude… That sounds kind of lame…"
"Trust me! You'll be thanking me later. I promise! Now get in!"
"Are you sure it's safe?"
"Perfectly. Danette has already tried it. She loved it!"

"Lucky bastard." Brian said under his breath as the sphere closed around his friend. "I wish I'd known about this before… Before… Jenn…"
Even though Brian's heart was sinking at the thought, he knew he would be protecting Mario from the same fate. A fate worse than death. Holy Matrimony...


Letter to the Editor

Inspired by STFUbelievers

Alice glanced at her watch. In these subzero temperatures the metal was frigid against her bare wrist and served as a constant reminder of her calling. The silver Ichthus engraving bit against her flesh with its icy teeth and she knew now that this was it. It was time. She tugged her mukluks onto her feet and forced the door open. She winced in pain when the frozen wind slapped at her face through the fur lined hood as she waddled down the steps. Pressing a frosty mitten to her face, she inhaled deeply as though she were filling her lungs with the frigid courage she needed to complete the job she had been sent to do. Slowly, deliberately, Alice made her way across the frozen yard towards the mailbox, her footsteps crunching against the piles of snow beneath her.
As she lowered the box flap she reminded herself that the world needed to see. To know what she knew. The others were so blind to the evils before them, but after tonight their eyes would be forced open and they would finally behold the iniquity around them.
She lifted the parcel to her lips and pressed a kiss against the seal. She could feel Him emanating through the cold paper. Through the words He had given her. The very words, hours ago, she had scrawled in her fevered state as He spoke to her.
"They must be warned before it's too late!" she said to the night as she lifted the rusted flag...



Aki&#39;s eye

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